If you ask family caregivers about things they wish they knew, you'd get a range of responses. Before you provide homecare for an aging parent, keep these issues in mind.
They Won't Always Agree With Your Methods
Your parents are adults who have been doing things their way for years. When you step in to provide homecare, they may not always agree with your decisions. In fact, they may be argumentative and agitated when you try to set limits or rules.
You're going to have to be patient. Work with your mom or dad and try to reach an agreement that makes everyone happy. When you have to do something they don't want, make sure you explain why you can't be more flexible.
It's Frustrating and Rewarding at the Same Time
Caring for a parent can be extremely frustrating. Watching your once-very-able parent's abilities decline is emotionally draining. Having a child tell you what needs doing or how it needs to be done is often irritating and can lead to insults and anger. When that anger's taken out on you, it hurts.
At the same time, you'll know you're helping keep them safe. That's a very rewarding feeling. From time to time, you might even hear how much they appreciate you. The sense of pride knowing you're doing a great job is a mood booster.
It May Cause Family Squabbles
You can think you're doing enough for your parents, but another relative doesn't see it that way. They see the times your parents are alone as neglect. You're frustrated and no longer want to talk to them. In some families, these disagreements can lead to messy squabbles.
You might find yourself refusing to talk to a sibling anymore. This can add stress to your life and also stress your aging parent. Your mom or dad may feel that they are to blame. You have to work to keep disagreements from reaching your parent.
Your Social Life May Decline
When you're caring for a parent daily or a few times a week, there will come times you have to refuse invitations. Your friends want to go out for dinner, but it's your night to care for your mom. While it's the new norm for you, your friends may not get it. Over time, they may stop inviting you.
Make sure you have time to socialize. Look into respite care services as part of a homecare plan. You want to prevent burnout, and this means taking breaks from time to time. Call our homecare agency to discuss respite care services.